Hello ladies, looking for a lady in public but a freek in bed as well as renting - Melbourne

Hello I'm 38 yr old man looking for a place to rent plus a beautiful lady that likes to be treated nicely in public but it's freek in da bed...
Possibly blonde small body in nature and I'm only 5'7 tall, skinny athletic mixed body of relationships not your go I need a place to rent 110%.. got a family business off building and contracting, but I got injured in lower back and now I'm on DSP,.. STILL MAKES MONEY ON THE SIDE WITH EBAY SELLING AND BUYING, AND OTHER SMALL AND SOMETIMES HALF BIG JOBS THE PAY OFF WELL,.,
I KNOW WHAT THEY SAY, ONCE I TRY BLACK U'LL BE NEEDING A WHEEL CHAIR TO GET AROUND..
OH MOST I'LL IMPORTANTLY MUST BE ABLE TO EITHER LAUGH With ME or be able to laugh at self, can't be serious all the time
We only have one life deep use it well and good karma will come your way of u beloved in that..
Like to travel once Money's all saved up and sheds on where to travel, love music all sorts but 90's hip hop big fan, love movies and tv shows binge watching and must love to laugh and not take everything so serious..
Ii need to move into a place tomorrow if can be of not interested in relationship, but one thing I can guarantee you is that you'll have a ball having fun, either being mates or in a relationship either way it'll be fun for both of us...
Got no kids myself, would love too, but if you have they'll be treated will too, obviously it'll be your say in that department, I get along with kids easily play Xbox box, cricket, bike ride, youtube watching music etc etc..
Holla if there is any takers cause I'm in camberfield @ the old formula one motel now known as the Ibis budget and have to check out @ 10am.. I've gotta mate's willing to help me move, but I need place to rent and a relationship would be bonus or other way around,., LoL,.